If you hear “not tonight, honey,” too often, it can cause resentment. But it doesn’t always mean that your husband rejects you and avoids sex.
10 reasons why your husband avoids sex
He may have his own cockroaches that prevent him from relaxing
The first cockroach: he just wants to relax after a busy day
That is, not to think about anything and just hang out. Didn’t you know? Men’s sexual mood is very much dependent on how relaxed they feel. Don’t push it. You can lay around with your books, watch a soap opera, or uncork a bottle of wine in the kitchen. When he calms down, he’ll come to you. Or not that day, but at least he’ll stop expecting that he “owes” you.
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Second cockroach: The kids
If they were just playing in your bedroom, you went to put them to bed and collected toys. If you jumped up at “maaaam, I pooped!” it could kill the whole sexy mood for both you and him. The way out? Make it a rule that after so-and-so hours, kids are not allowed in their parents’ room. It’s your territory only.
Cockroach three: he wants to watch sports or play on the computer
Normal desires. Sometimes men need to tuck into their imaginary world and be there. If this becomes too much in your life, arrange for days when he does NOT do it.
Cockroach four: You’re on your period
This is worth finding out with a straightforward question. Many men are embarrassed by periods, but they are afraid to admit it to you.
Cockroach five: he wants more spontaneous sex
Break the routine. Send the kids to Grandma’s for the weekend and don’t insist on anything. Spontaneous sex will happen on its own.
Cockroach six: He’s having problems at work
Don’t push. Just sympathize and don’t insist on sex. When a man doesn’t “have to,” he can take the initiative himself.
The seventh cockroach: he begins to complex because of his appearance
Yes, not only women are worried about their attractiveness. Say affectionate words to him more often. Turn off the light, after all, if he is worried that you will see his tummy. Let him blindfold you, buy a gym membership and go with him if he agrees.
Cockroach eight: He’s still thinking about work in bed
Turn off your cell phones and email when you’re home. Home is home. Work can wait until morning. Give him a couple of hours after you get home from work not to think about it.
Cockroach nine: He’s afraid of failing
Make it clear that you don’t expect him to have sexual marathons if he’s out of shape. Or move sex to the morning.
Cockroach ten: he just wants to sleep
Now this is not a cockroach. If you or your husband really want to sleep, just sleep. Agree, if you’re both comfortable with that, that you can wake up in the middle of the night to have sex. Sometimes arousal strikes while you’re asleep. And if you both like it, then.
“Wake me up if you feel like it.”
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